by Leigh Ann Dilley on January 24, 2024
Everyone loves a good mentor; even great theologians love mentors. We all need someone we can talk to about life, ideas, behaviors, and especially scriptural applications. Parents make great mentors for their children. The Bible says generations are blessed when family relationships stay healthy and spiritual mentorship is present. Every parent is called to mentor their child. If you have not experienced this type of relationship, it is never too late.
Titus 2:3-5 describes older women training younger women in several areas, but spiritual mentorship has less to do with age and more to do with spiritual maturity.
What does a spiritual mentor look like?
First, a spiritual mentor must have time margins in her life because she will give of her time and of her mental and physical energy. Mentorship begins with the development of a trusting relationship and trust takes time and experience to build. A spiritual mentor is an initiator, and she is intentional in what she does within this relationship. She invites the mentee into the daily routines of her life. A mentor cannot be too absorbed in her own life because that would take the focus off her mentee and put it on herself.
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Mentorship is about helping the mentee navigate life through the application of scripture because if we don't know how to apply God's word, what good is it? Therefore, a mentor listens well, asks probing questions, guides, coaches, acts as a role model, and trains her mentee on how to be accountable. Ultimately, she trains her mentee to be a good spiritual mother herself. A good mentor is never prideful, nor does she force her own decisions onto the mentee. She allows the mentee to make her own mistakes without judgment. She might, however, gently evaluate the outcome of poor choices with the mentee. A mentor knows God has a plan for her mentee. She encourages the mentees to develop her own prayer communication with God, so the mentee gains confidence in her own discernment of where God wants her.
Finally, a spiritual mentor knows her effectiveness as a mentor hinges on her own strong relationship with the Father. Her heart posture is to love and encourage others. When spiritual children feel loved and accepted, they trust their mentor, even if she gently confronts a behavior or an attitude. This also means the mentor is brave and courageous.
Her goal is always to glorify God and bring others into a close relationship with Him, creating new spiritual mentors, so this cycle continues and multiplies!
For years, I have tried to start a mentorship program for women at Timberline. The difficulty has been in how to set up and manage the relationships between mentor and mentee. Recently, however, I've come to learn that mentor/mentee relationships are more effective if they happen naturally and informally, much like a parent and a child. The good news is I've seen these types of informal relationships develop repeatedly within our small groups, MOPS, and Bible studies, even among our leaders. Women lead other women into spiritual maturity until new spiritual leaders are born! This cycle is a thing of beauty, and that is how God designed it.
Every woman needs a mentor, so I want to challenge and encourage anyone who reads this to be intentional about being a mentor and developing someone. We need you! This is how we make disciples.
Discipleship is the priority in our Women's Ministry mission statement and vision. Pray God will show you someone who needs you. If you think you are not ready to be a mentor, again, I challenge and encourage you. You are likely more ready than you think you are. Mother Theresa said, "We don't have to be perfect; we have to be obedient." None of us are ever done growing, and mentorship offers growth all the way around.
